We’ve got some family visiting this weekend, and we’ve planned what I hope will be a very enjoyable baby party, despite the weather not cooperating. (Because yes, after a whole summer with no rain, it now rains like clockwork every Saturday.)
So, in light of the upcoming busy-ness, I’ve decided to take a quick blogging break. I don’t like to do this without planning ahead, but I feel like I can’t focus well on my writing right now. So much else going on over these next few days! (And that’s not even mentioning the work going on in the house – the bathroom’s coming together!) It’s lovely, appreciated chaos, and I’m so excited to celebrate Baby Girl with some of my favorite people in the world.
And hopefully, I’ll have the energy to do just that, because you guys, pregnancy takes it out of you. I can’t sleep these days. It’s impossible to get and stay comfortable, and Baby Girl is a little gymnast. If I don’t nap for a couple of hours during the day, I’m pretty much a drooling zombie. But a very happy drooling zombie. We’re 32 weeks on Friday, and I just can’t wait to meet this kid. If you’d told me three years ago I’d be looking forward to motherhood this way, I would have called you crazy. Now, I’m so ready for this shift, and I’m eager to see who I’ll be – how I’ll change, how I won’t – come December. But I do miss sleep. Already. And as I understand it, that doesn’t get better for a little while. Worth it, though. So worth it.
All of that being said, I’ll be back on Wednesday, October 18th, and I’ve got lots of fun posts planned – an update on the (possibly) most haunted house in Loudoun County, some thoughts on spooky season and why Halloween is the best, a call for some Q&A questions now that I’ve hit 1000 followers (thank you so much for reading and sticking around!), and of course, October’s short story.
So, stop by next week and we’ll catch up! For now, happy creating, y’all!
I’m just here in the corner – I watch, I see, but no one sees me. They pace the floor, drink their tea and count the hours. The world turns and I am still, more solid somehow than before. It is an enviable position, to be invisible. They say it’s the fate of all women: to disappear.
…work on our main bathroom has officially started!
As you can see, we’ve gone from tired but functional…
…to barely controlled chaos.
I’m not mad about it. Hopefully it will only take a couple of weeks, and then we’ll have the space back and better than ever. It’s our last big project, so I’m excited and eager to see it done. We’ve had to pull back on some of what I wanted to do, since Baby Girl’s due date is getting closer and closer. I’m a little worried my tile choices will look a little plain, since we won’t be putting up wallpaper. At least not yet. But I think it’ll be fine. If nothing else, it will look bright and fresh!
I know I keep forgetting to post pictures of the downstairs bathroom, so I’ll try to do that this week. Trust me – the pink tile was the right choice.
We came to the woods to find them. We came to search. We think we’re hunting them. We were wrong.
************
September 15, 2022 (noon)
This is day one. I’m excited, and I think the others are, too. As excursions go, this one is fairly long for me, and I think I’ve packed enough. Clothes, food, water – I’m only worried about coffee. But that’s, as they say, a me problem. Dan would say I’m addicted. I say he wouldn’t like me without coffee. I guess we’ll see which of us is more correct.
I suppose I can take some time and space here to talk about what we’re doing, and why I’m excited, and how I got here in the first place. One day, when I’m eighty, if I can keep up with this journal, I might like to read it and enjoy the memories. So it started like this:
I’m eight, or maybe nine, and my dad has gone camping with two if his good friends. Just camping. But they get more than they bargain for, and on the last night of their trip, they score the coolest recording I’ve ever heard. Hoots and calls and howls and growls, and they swear, up and down, that they managed to get proof of Bigfoot. I’m hooked. I’ve always believed in ghosts and magic. I like the idea that there are things in this world that we haven’t figured out yet. Awfully boring otherwise, right? And that tape becomes an obsession. I listen to it over and over. I start categorizing the sounds. I start researching on my own. And now, all these years later, I finally get to go out and try my luck. It’s taken me a while to feel comfortable telling people about this, because I’m not crazy or stupid. But man, if I could get a recording, or even better, a picture. I know chances are slim. But I have to try anyway.
So, into the woods I go.
There are five of us in the group. Me and Dan, who’s only coming along because he says I can’t be trusted to not freeze to death. Laura, for her camera. Ryan – he’s searching, too, and he’s good with maps. And Scott. Because he didn’t have anything better to do. We’re loading up the car now, and I’m stealing a minute to write this. I should go help. And then we’re off!
Will write more when I can.
September 16, 2022 (8:30 a.m.)
Night one was…less than successful. First of all, it rained. It rained from the time we got into the woods to the time we woke up this morning, and now it’s foggy and gray.
We couldn’t have recorded anything if we wanted to. We couldn’t make dinner. Which is fine, because we packed granola bars and such. But still, just not the night we wanted.
And the rain plays tricks on your ears. Scott freaked himself out thinking he was hearing popping and cracking sounds around our campsite, and then he freaked the rest of us out, too. Convinced something was going to ambush us and eat us in the middle of the night. We all know better, but it is disconcerting to listen to rain splatter everywhere and to know it’s impacting what else you can hear. Or rather, what else you can’t. It’s easy to think something’s there when it’s not. For Ryan and me, I think that might actually be exciting, but for the others, I think they’d rather not think about it.
Otherwise, an uneventful night. Hopefully the fog clears and we have better luck today.
In the meantime, I’ve started recording what I think are the standard conditions out here, at least as I can see them. Lots of twigs and leaf cover on the ground, rocky and uneven. Caves up on the hills. Might be worth exploring a few of those, just in case. It’s mostly quiet around here now, the calm after the storm, so to speak.
One major area of interest: There’s lots of mud near the river now. Could be a great place to find tracks.
September 17, 2022 (8:00 a.m.)
The fog never cleared yesterday, but today it’s sunny and bit warmer. It was frustrating to lose a day, though. I suggested we walk along the river and look for any signs there. Now all of our boots are covered in mud and Dan thinks I’m a crazy person.
Morning now, and so we’re trying to get an early start. I’ll come back to this later with any updates.
September 17, 2022 (7:00 p.m.)
Okay, so Dan’s actually really mad at me, and Scott’s being a weirdo. He’s insisting he saw tracks in the mud. I looked – I was hoping he was right – but honestly they just looked like puddles to me. Ryan looked, too, and wasn’t sure either way, and Laura snapped a couple of pictures, just in case. I told Scott there are lots of animals in these woods that we’re not searching for, and to just let it go.
Dan’s upset about his boots, and he’s also frustrated that I didn’t bring any wool socks. And he’s not wrong. I totally forgot. He’s loaned me his second pair, which means he doesn’t get dry socks. I feel bad. I don’t know. We’ve only got two more nights out here, and that’s counting tonight. We’re heading home on Monday. I think we’ll be fine.
In a bit of bad news, though, it’s starting to rain again. Hopefully it passes soon and we’re able to head out for an hour or so later this evening to do some searching in the dark. We’ve not had any luck during the day, so maybe we’ll do better at night?
September 18, 2022 (2:30 a.m.)
No dice on the night search. The rain won’t let up. And Scott’s convinced he’s hearing something out in the woods. He says it’s following us. It’s making everybody nervous, even Ryan. I thought he’d be interested, but he says we’d be better to leave it along, whatever it is. Dan thinks I’m being mean to Scott. Laura thinks Scott’s being paranoid, but I’ve seen her looking over her shoulder. I kind of can’t believe it. Dan, Laura, and Ryan are all pretty experienced hikers, so I didn’t think this would be a problem. I’m over here fuming, honestly, because this is so dumb, but I think maybe we all just need to get some rest. It’s not a been a great day, and we’re tired, but it won’t help anything to just sit here and scare ourselves and be irritated with each other.
This is not the experience that I wanted.
September 18, 2022 (5:00 p.m.)
Scott, Laura, and Ryan have all packed up and left. They’re going to hike to the closest town and catch a ride from there. So it’s just Dan and me. I love that man. He’s annoyed as hell, but he’ll stick with me. And at least Ryan left us his map.
Anyway, the others are leaving because this morning, when we woke up, there was a massive tree branch right outside of our tents. Like, right outside. I don’t know how it didn’t fall and kill all of us. Scott is convinced it was “the Bigfoots.” That’s what he’s been calling them. I’m not sad to see him go. I pointed out that it was just bad luck, that the rain’s been really heavy. But the others said it doesn’t matter. It’s clearly not safe out here right now, and it’s better to leave.
I don’t disagree with them. And I’m worried about Dan’s poor, wet feet. But it’s only one more night. We’re out of here tomorrow morning. I just don’t even feel like I’ve really had the chance to do what I came here to do. I haven’t searched any of the caves. I haven’t been able to record anything. I just can’t leave yet, not while I still have a chance.
The weather’s dried out. My plan is to head out tonight after dinner and bring the recorder and a camera. If I don’t find anything, then fine. I won’t be the first. But I can’t just give up.
September 18, 2022 (11:00 p.m.)
I’m stealing a minute because we heard them! Or, we heard something. I think it was a Bigfoot. Dan thinks it was a bear. But I got it on tape! And we’ve definitely been hearing some popping and cracking sounds out in the woods – maybe now that Scott’s not whining about it, I can hear it better? – so I think we might finally have some luck! I’m planning to check out some caves in the morning before we leave. But for now, I’m going to stay up, listen, and hope I get something good.
September 19, 2022 (1:00 a.m.)
I’m probably an idiot. I’m out in the woods. I’m taking a breathing break. But I can hear them. They’re out here. They’re close. I actually think I heard one of them following me. It almost sounded like it took a step for every step I took. Maybe it’s unwise, but I’m taking this chance, just hoping to get a picture. It’s true that I don’t have Laura’s awesome camera, but maybe I’ll get lucky enough to score something. Fingers crossed!
September 19, 2022 (9:00 a.m.)
We’re supposed to pack up and head back morning, but it’s pouring down rain. Pouring. I did manage to poke my head into a couple of caves last night, which was not the smartest thing to do, and I didn’t find anything anyway. But at least I’ve got the recordings.
We went to bed at about 3:00 last night, and when we woke up, I swear it looks like our tent is just in a whole different spot. It’s just the rain, I know.
Dan’s thinking maybe we should just wait out the weather. We’ve got enough supplies for one more night, and we’d both rather be safe than injured. I can’t lie – I’m elated after last night, and hoping that if we do stay, we’re able to get some real, definitive evidence.
Dan’s sick of wet feet.
September 19, 2022 (3:00 p.m.)
Well, we’re definitely not going anywhere today. We’ve packed up, and we’ve been trying to figure out where we are, but I swear, things just look different in the rain. It’s so foggy and damp, and it keeps pouring and then misting. Dan’s so frustrated. He can’t figure out WHY he can’t figure out where we are. We can’t even find the river. I’m a little scared, but I trust him, and he knows what he’s doing. I figure, If nothing else, we can set up camp tonight and try again in the morning, hopefully after the weather lets up. For now, we’re stopping and resting. It’s useless to just tire ourselves out for no reason.
I haven’t said anything, but I swear, I think Scott got into my head. I hear stuff. I hear stuff and I’m worried and I think it’s just the stress of being a little lost. I should be excited, because I swear I saw something big and hairy out of the corner of my eye as we were trying to figure out where we could set up. But I think it was just a tree. I think I’m just tired. I’ll probably write more later. Maybe the rain will let up and I can get in one more good night.
September 19, 2022 (8:00 p.m.)
We’ve eaten dinner, and Dan says we’re not going anywhere tonight. No searching. No recording. Just sitting, safe and quiet, in our tent. He’s convinced there’s a bear in the area, and it’s safest to stay where we are. I kind of hope it’s just a bear at this point. I was excited, but I’m feeling a little…stalked? I can’t think of the right word. But I’ve definitely felt some kind of shift in the air. I’m ready to go home. I’m going to turn in early, and hopefully in the morning, we’ll get out of here quickly.
************
September 20, 2022 (2:30 a.m.)
They’re hunting us.
************
Thank you for reading! This is the ninth of twelve stories I’ll write for my 2023 Short Story Challenge. The theme this year is: Wild.
Here are the first eight, if you’d like to read them:
I hope you join me and write some stories of your own this year! It’s fun, and I hope this will be a happy year full of good stories. But just reading is fine, too, and I’m glad you’re here.
The next story will be posted at the end of October.
Between the moon and stars and me, I see endless possibilities, a path of many ways. In that quiet when the rest of the world sleeps, there’s the time my mind can play: scraps of paper filled with stories, starts and ends and lovers meeting, a thousand little pauses of sound and silence. This is my trade – and it’s a fair one, I think – rest for writing and creating instead of bed, It’s just a different kind of dreaming, to be awake in that space flanked by dusk and day.
Now that the kitchen is finished, I spent some time this weekend rearranging things a bit. Nothing major – just some tweaks to how I’d decorated, because it’s always nice to change things up and make things fresh, right?
Well, Merlin must agree, because he found a new spot (yes, another one), and I’d say he fits right in, wouldn’t you?
Yes, he’s quite the showpiece.
Alas, I evicted him shortly after taking the picture, and he had to find another comfy nook to look handsome in. But he managed. As cats do.
Figured we could all use a smile on this Monday morning, and Merlin always obliges, doesn’t he? 😊
Upstairs bathroom renovation starts this week. Short story hopefully on Friday. Happy creating, y’all!
Lately, Graham and I have been talking extensively about what we want to name our Baby Girl, because cute as it is, she can’t just be “Baby Girl” forever. And y’all, it’s so hard.
Funny story: I was born six weeks early, and my parents hadn’t decided on my name yet. They’d gone back and forth on several different choices, and just couldn’t seem to agree. Finally, it came down to it, and they were unexpectedly out of time. My mom wanted just “Katie.” My dad said I’d want a more mature name as I got older, and suggested “Kathryn.” Kathryn stuck, but I’ve been Katie my whole life. When someone calls me Kathryn, I genuinely have no idea who they’re talking to. I’ve missed more than one question at school, and sat awkwardly several times in doctor’s offices as they call me back over and over again. To be clear, I’m fine with the name Kathryn, and I like the spelling my parents chose. But my name is Katie. It always has been.
And that’s how it should be, right? Your name just fits. But how are we supposed to get there?
I won’t share them here, because then it’ll be a fun surprise, but we’ve narrowed our list down to two names. I don’t know which one we’ll choose. We use them every day, just to see if one feels better than the other. We like them both. Which one, though, is HER name? Which one will she connect with?
I’m probably overthinking this.
But then, am I?
Unless she decides to change her name when she’s older – which would be fine, since it’s her name and her life – we get one chance to get this right. I don’t want to let her down.
A Virginia Writer's Diary 