On sleep, and how I’m bad at it.

Some of you may recall a post from August of 2020 – Three Insomnia Haiku. And well, folks, here we are again, in the Land of Little Sleep. At this point, I feel like I must be among its most frequent and loyal inhabitants.

The facts are these:

  1. I have never been a good sleeper. Not once in my entire life.
  2. I’m apparently a good enough sleeper that I don’t qualify for heavier sleep aids (and I don’t really want to use those anyway), so melatonin and chamomile tea it is.
  3. They…don’t really work.
  4. See Number 1.

I don’t know how many of you know the feeling of staring endlessly at your ceiling in the dark, or of tossing and turning and never quite finding that comfy spot on your pillow, or of flipping through the channels trying to find something (anything) that might bore you to sleep or drown out the invasive anxieties running through your head. But if you’re dealing with any of that, then know that I am with you, my friend, and man, it just really, really sucks. And if you’re not, consider yourself lucky and enjoy that blissful rest you’re getting.

Why am I writing about this now? No idea, honestly. It was just on my mind. It’s been on my mind all day, as I’ve groggily moved from task to task, never quite focusing completely and thinking way too much about the possibility of maybe, just maybe crawling into bed tonight and closing my eyes and cozily drifting off with a purring Gatsby snuggled up beside me.

But I digress.

Or do I?

You know, I’m honestly not sure. I’m sleepy, y’all.

At any rate, if anyone has any clever tricks for falling (and perhaps more importantly STAYING) asleep, feel free to share them! At this point, I’ll try just about anything. Except warm milk. Ew.

9 thoughts on “On sleep, and how I’m bad at it.

  1. SAMEEE! I’ve always had a hard time falling asleep since my teen years. Honestly, the only time I managed to get my sleep in order was in 2018-19 when I was working out to lose weight and eating healthy. But ever since the pandemic I’ve gone back to just tossing in bed for endless hours forcing my mind to shut off but not being able to. *SIGH* The only time I knock out is after a physically taxing day – but still keep waking up through the night I’m hoping I can get back to my perfect sleep schedule. :’)

    Liked by 1 person

    • The pandemic’s definitely made it harder for me, too. 😦 Even if I force myself to go to bed early, I do the same thing – just tossing and turning and circling through the same thoughts.


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